[Insert Ambiguous All-Inclusive Title Here]

Being that I haven't written in a little while, I'm hoping I can cover a few subjects at once. That, and despite the late hour I'm not tired enough to go to bed and I think some good writing will help me get to sleep.

First, SOA. Since we got back right before Thanksgiving, I didn't get much of a chance to process because I got thrown into the mix of everything else going on. Now that I've had a little while to process, along with having a gathering last night (that is, Wed night) with a bunch of us to share pictures and brainstorm where we go from here.

So the experience is currently in my mind so I'm going to get out some of my thoughts now.

It was a very interesting experience. As I said before in my posts leading up to the SOA, it's not your stereotypical picketing with signs kind of protest.

It began with the "Ignatian Family Teach-In" which is more or less a social justice conference and a gathering point for Jesuit Universities, High Schools, Parishes, Jesuit Volunteer Corp and a handful of other Catholic groups. It was a good experience, especially hearing from some of the students of different universities. Unfortunately I was tired Friday evening and Saturday morning so I was in-and-out during a large percentage of the talks, which is unfortunate because there were some very good speakers.

After that, we were able to hang out at the "Rally" which I equate to a fair or festival. There is a stage up near the gate to Fort Benning, with speakers and music, along with vendors up and down the street (quite an eclectic mix for sure, anything from socialist anarchists and the green party to Grandmothers for Peace to conspiracy theorists, and student and religious groups) which was fun to explore. I got some good bumper stickers :)

Saturday evening concluded with a Mass, which was interesting, especially with the huge number of universities high schools and other groups represented, but there was still that lingering disconnection I experience being a non-catholic in a deeply catholic world. But I'm glad I stayed instead of joining the other members of our group who didn't join the Mass. Kinda. What Would Jesus Do anyway? Haha.

We gathered after the Mass and have a group meeting, discussing what thoughts we might have as we moved into the heart of why we were there the next day. It was a very moving experience, hearing the stories and the pain of some of our delegation. What was most moving to me, enough to cause me to catch my breath even as I write it was the pain of one of our leaders, as he expressed the heaviness and pain that he feels in his heart, knowing that he is in some ways responsible for destroying some of our innocence about the world, even though he knows it is necessary. This is where I don't know if I can describe my experience. For how can I put into words the breaking of my heart?

Sunday was what you would call the protest. They (or is it we? not sure) call it the "Solemn Funeral Procession" where we assemble in front of the gate and process towards it, calling out after the name of someone killed by one of the Graduates of the SOA/WINSEC "Presente!" which means "present" hearkening to the (predominantly) Catholic belief of the Communion of the Saints and thus their presence and prayers going with us, (although, I think it also fits well with the thought that we present them to the school) and upon reaching the gate place whatever crosses or banners we have carried, onto the fence, creating a beautiful memorial. It is also at this point that some people choose to use civil disobedience and cross onto the base, promptly being arrested. 16 crossed this year.

The rest of our time was spent wandering around the grounds, thinking, talking, processing through what we just went through. On my part I got to do a little shopping and spend some time with some other people from Colorado whom I knew (including the awesome guy that was my coordinator of the Romero House over the summer, and one of the other awesome guys that I got to work with at the St. Francis Center).

Where I find myself in response to this crossroad in my life is perhaps not as much an increased passion to close the SOA/WINSEC, but an overall call to be aware, from anything to fair trade goods, sweatshops, political and social issues, non-violence... Social Justice in all it's forms. I don't think I can say that I feel God directing me to a life wholly devoted to Social Justice as many people I know are, but I know it is something I cannot ignore. Something I cannot forget about and sweep under the carpet.

The world is broken. Enough so that if I dwell on it, it could crush me. I know even more why I, and the world, need Jesus. I support social and political change, education, protests, controversy and whatever else you could think of. But I don't believe that any of that without Jesus has any chance to succeed.

This leads to the next big thing in my life.

With the SOA, I didn't have much of a chance to think about this, but in a little over a month, I will be in El Salvador. A Pilgrimage. A chance to see right in front of me some of the issues which I protested down in Georgia.

I'm not sure if I'm ready.

In some ways I wish I was going with at least someone else from my church. In our group, there is a Lutheran Professor, and the rest are mainly Catholic, or at least raised Catholic and currently questioning, and then there is me. This presents the same kind of challenge that I experienced with the SOA. Not only are not everyone going of a theological bent closer to me, many are not as spiritual, at least in the Jesus sense, which means that in a fundamental way, there is a necessary lack of depth as we don't want to exclude anyone.

And even with the people who I know who are followers of Jesus, God bless them, are not necessarily those who I feel like I could pour my heart out too. Maybe two of them. But I don't know. Even then, I don't think they would pray for me. At least not in the way my church does it. I know that God will probably use me, and that hopefully I can reach out some. But I wonder who will reach out to me?

With the SOA and now this, it seems like I'm going into it alone. To put it very generally, I'm more Catholic than most of my Evangelical friends, but more Evangelical than my Catholic friends, and I feel caught in the middle, where I know for the most part who I am and where I am with God, but when I look around me I only see a few people that are where I am at. And none of them are coming to El Salvador with me.

Sure, God is with me. But it's not supposed to be just me and God. It's a community. And I seem to be stuck between two worlds. My Church and my School. I wonder if I'm going to be able to handle this.

It's going to be hard enough going to a country that speaks Spanish while I only gained un poco from 4 years of studying it (I experienced that in Spain) but one that has experienced so much pain and hardship and is still living it now.

I know we are going to go to a Mass down there and God Dammit I don't want to be cut off from communion. Not there. Damned Church Politics and Theology. What happened to the Body of Christ? How can I be in communion with the wonderful people I'm going with and with the country so broken, when I can't share it with them?

How long must my heart cry out? How can we hope to heal the broken world if we cannot even heal the brokenness between all those who follow Jesus. Come Holy Spirit and wash us pure, make us whole... "As we cry out to You, oh Lord make us one / Let the whole earth see through us what You’ve done / May our hands find reach for what our words can’t preach / Oh Lord make us one"

By the way. Every 11 seconds, someone dies from AIDS. Remember in your prayers those 25 Million who have died, the 40 Million currently infected, and the countless children, spouses, families and friends affected by this disease.

SOA installment #4

So I leave this morning for the SOA in another hour.

This week has been a very conflicted one for me... I hope going away for this weekend will give me the chance to relax some... But we will see.

On the one hand I can't wait for this to be over, because it will free up more of my time. I feel bad in a way saying that, but I'm burned out.

I just hope I have enough left in me to respond to how God moves in me over the weekend.

I probably won't have internet while I'm gone, but those of you who have my number are free to call. Messages are always appriciated and I will call back whenever I get a chance.

VICTORY FOR THE FORCES OF DEMOCRATIC FREEDOM! (pardon the inside joke...)

-Daniel

SOA Installment #3

Hello everyone,

If you have been following my life at all, you know that I am going to the SOA soon. I wanted to provide some more information. I mainly would like to encourage me to pray for me and the 32 other students. But, the other reality is that it does cost us money to go down there. So without further ado, enjoy the blurb.

~~~~

For those of you who do not know, the SOA (recently renamed the Western Hemispheric Institute for Security Cooperation) is a military training school at Ft. Benning, GA that instructs Latin American soldiers in a variety of capacities including techniques used for torture. I have educated myself on the issues surrounding the SOA and have come to the conclusion that this is not a school that I want my taxes or my country to support. Through educating myself I have learned the following incidences are the responsibility of SOA graduates:

• The El Mozote massacre in El Salvador, which took the lives of 900 civilians
• The Uraba, Segovia, Trujillo and the Riofrio massacres in Columbia.
• The assassination of Archbishop Oscar Romero of San Salvador.
• The massacre of six Jesuit Priests, their housekeeper and her daughter at the University of Central America in San Salvador in 1989.

Since 1990, the SOA Watch organization has been protesting the existence and the funding of this school. Each November, protesters gather at the gates of Fort Benning to speak up as a voice for the thousands of voiceless or silenced victims of Latin America. This protest is not only a time to voice our opposition to the SOA, but is also a time for us to take part in the Ignatian Family Teach-In in the two days prior to the protest. The Teach-In is an opportunity for students, staff, and faculty from Jesuit high schools, colleges, and universities to support each other and learn about other methods of educating people about the SOA as well as other social justice issues.

I am writing to ask for your support in our decision to stand up for those who are not able to stand up for themselves. This year we have a group of thirty-three students and staff at Regis University committed to this cause. As a group, we have decided to work on educating our peers about not only the SOA, but other current social justice issues. We are not trying to convince people to oppose the School of the Americas, but seek to become informed about the complex issues surrounding U.S. foreign policy.

The support we are asking for may come in the following ways:
• Emotional support- Not everyone is in favor of my protesting the School of the Americas and any encouragement through letters or cards would be appreciated.
• Spiritual support- A number of individuals on the trip are asking for spiritual support through prayer both before and during our trip.
• Financial support- We are estimating a cost of $14,000 for the thirty-three of us to fly to Georgia and to cover accommodations. We are hoping to reduce the individual costs through fundraising and your support. Checks can be made out to Regis University and can be sent to University Ministry at 3333 Regis Boulevard Mail Stop J-4 Denver, Colorado 80221. Or you can give it to me in person if your able.

If you would like more information about the School of the Americas or about my decision to attend the protest, please let me know or visit www.soaw.org. I look forward to hearing from you!

In Solidarity,

Daniel James

SOA installment #2

So I had my next meeting for the SOA delegation tonight. So, before I forget I want to write down some of the things I learned.

First, in talking to a few people about the SOA protest, the two big questions that I've heard are "Is there any actual benefit/result from protesting" and "Simply because graduates of the SOA have been implicated in human rights violations, does this mean that the SOA is directly responsible?"

These two questions were addressed in today's meeting, among other things. We watched the first half of a documentary that seeks to provide a somewhat balanced view of the SOA by interviewing both supporters and protesters of the SOA to present as many sides of the issue as possible.

First, as far as protests, I think that the majority of protests are not successful. I think this is because most protesters really don't know what they are doing, so they simply end up being angry people carrying signs that annoy people. This is not what the SOA protest is.

One of the main parts of the SOA protest is that it is non-violent in the spirit of MLK Jr and Gandhi. Before we go down, I'm going to go through a non-violence training in order to have a better understanding of what it means.

Yes, a huge part of the SOA protest is displaying our disagreement with how our tax dollars are being spent, as is our right as citizens. But in addition, there is a huge aspect of education and information. Along with the protest itself is what is called the "Ignatian Family Teach-In" which from my understanding is a peace and justice conference of sorts with speakers on many different subjects beyond the SOA.

There is also a living memorial for all those who have died because of graduates of the SOA. So it is much more than a bunch of people going down to Georgia with "CLOSE THE SOA" signs.

Additionally, there are people working with representatives etc. at the governmental level, along with visits to the Latin American countries urging governments not to send soldiers. So the protest itself is only one part of all that is going on around the SOA.

Second question. For a rough example, I'm going to use Columbine. Simply because two students became violent, does that mean the school itself was at fault? No. In many ways, this does apply to the SOA, except it is much deeper.

So far, 600 graduates of the 600,000 have been implicated in human rights violations. 1%. This is a relatively small number (although, this is documented cases, there might be a significant number more that could be implicated). Supporters of the SOA argue that they do not teach their students to be criminals.

On the one level this is true. Although, torture tactics were taught at one time at the school, and currently there is counter-insurgency and anti-narcotics training.

One of my fellow students commented tonight that going to the SOA is an honor for a soldier, so governments will choose their most promising soldiers. Because many of these governments are corrupt, thus their soldiers have their agendas, not necessarily that of the US.

Therefor, there is a great responsibility in the governments of the countries, and how they use their soldiers. However, even though the SOA itself may not be teaching these soldiers to violate human rights, is it moral to keep operating the school, knowing that the training is going to be used for these purposes?

But, one might say, they are being trained to fight against communism, and against rogue paramilitary groups. This may be true, however, anyone who fights for the rights of the common people, and that resources should stay in the country, can easily be labeled as communists.

It would also be foolhardy to claim that the US doesn't have an agenda. We wouldn't put millions of dollars into a program if it wasn't going to help protect US interests. And that includes big corporations who are taking advantage of cheap labor, and have huge connections with the rich ruling families in many Latin American countries.

This is why I believe the SOA should be closed.

I will continue to post what I learn. Please ask me any questions, because not only does it help me to inform all of you, but to also have more things to learn about myself.

SOA installment #1

So, I had my first official meeting for the SOA protest delegation from Regis tonight.

If you don't know about the School of the Americas, I recommend going to www.soaw.org. In brief, it's a training camp in Ft. Benning Georgia which trains military personnel from Latin American countries. The problem is, the "graduates" of the program have been linked to many human rights violations, including the assassination of Archbishop Oscar Romero, six Jesuit priests and their two housekeepers, four American church women, not to mention the eradication of many villages and individuals, making a grand total of thousands of innocent lives.

And this is funded with my tax money. That makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

So, tonight begins the process which will culminate at the SOA protest down in Georgia in the middle of November.

I'm sure I will have more to say at later dates.

Until then, I covet your prayers, for my sake, and for our delegation, and most importantly for the entire situation.

Close the SOA!

-Daniel