11:59 and other happenings

So I was finally able to see 11:59 in the theatre. It was awesome. It was really great to see a movie that was filmed in Colorado by Coloradans. If I hadn't gone on the last day it was here, I would recommend that people should go see it. There is always the DVD. Until then, you can find out more about it by going to www.doubleedgefilms.com.

In other news... my spring break is almost over. Sad. That means I have to go back to school soon, and that I need to finish up homework for next week. So much for getting more done during the week (~innocent grin~). It's not like I haven't been productive at all, and I haven't spent my entire break on the computer which is definitely a good step for me. I know I still could do better, but it's hard with as big of a part that the computer plays in my life.

I only got about three and a half hours of sleep last night. I have been awake since 4:30. It kinda sucks. It hasn't really hit me yet, but I'm sure it will soon. I just woke up and I couldn't go back to sleep. Sleeping on a recliner doesn't help that much though I'm afraid. Also, my friend's dad was up and about at 5:45 so that kinda killed any chance of falling back asleep for me.

I also went to the dentist yesterday. Yay. Nothing like dropping $132 in 30 minutes. I was in on a day that the dentist wasn't in, so I will find out on Monday if there is anything in my x-rays. I hadn't been for a year and a half, and my wisdom teeth were just coming in around then, so we will see how things go. I have a little chip in one of my teeth that I will need to get fixed eventually, but I hope that is the only thing I will have to worry about. I admit, I'm terrible at flossing but I do brush 99% of every night and if I don't then I do it in the morning.

Speaking of dentist appointments, one of my friends got to have her wisdom teeth out over spring break (yay for her!). I got a text message from her saying that there were complications and she was in a lot of pain. I haven't really heard anything else from her so I hope she is doing better. She has been through enough surgeries already, and unfortunately she has more this summer. She has really been leaning on God throughout it, but it is still hard to watch her go through everything. I know she would appriciate it if you prayed for her.

Well, that is my life for now. There are some other things I might comment on later but I'm undecided about it. I think I might want to talk to some people in person before I go off and post about it. We shall see.

Until then,

-Daniel

Stupid airports

Okay so yesterday I went with a friend to pick somebody up from the airport. As we got close there was a 45 minute waiting area where you could park before picking somebody up. We passed that by because our friend's flight was supposed to come in at 6:21.

Four loops around the airport later he is finally ready to get out. Is it just me or is this the stupidest system? If you arrive too early to pick somebody up you’re forced to drive around aimlessly. It's a huge waste of time and gas from what I can tell. How about having the waiting area closer? Oh wait, that would require giving up valuable parking space which we can make thousands of dollars on. So much for things being a service.

I could insert a nice rant about consumerism right now but that isn't going to really change anything. I could write hundreds of essays about the origins and effects of consumerism, etc. etc. Sure it might make some people think a little harder about our culture, but the way it is, we can't escape it. And as much as ideologically I would love to get out of consumerism, I think that if I was honest I wouldn't like it. Sure, it's easy to pick on Wal Mart and other big companies that are known to be shady in their treatment of employees, and sweatshops and what have you but the majority of American life is built on other people.

Take food for example. It's a huge part of our existence but I don't see many farmers owning huge houses and expensive cars. Yet we have actors and sports figures that are our entertainment and they are the ones who have cushy lives. Where the is the sense in that? Sure I like going to movies and playing my videogames but do I think that most of my money should go towards that? Not really. Perhaps that's why I don't really have many qualms over downloading movies off the internet once in awhile. I admit bad justification and it doesn't make piracy morally correct, but it is a thought anyway. Alas.

It's hard to try and be counter-culture when I'm in the middle of it. Sure, I can avoid shopping at Wal Mart and other such places, and watch where things I buy are manufactured, and only support artists that I think deserve it. I know I can make a little bit of a difference in that way, but real change has to be personal and cultural, and the powers that be (physical and spiritual) aren't exactly willing for that to happen.

What is ultimately needed from what I can gather is a revolution. Spiritual and physical. Humans need to be the ones that change our society, and we need God to push down the spiritual forces that ultimately drive us humans towards pride, greed, power, lust, etc. that have formed the earth as we know it now. That's what Christianity is really about when you think about it. Sure, redeeming the person is extremely important, but the Kingdom of God on earth means just that. God wants to restore his creation. All of it. Not just us humans but our societies and nations.

Come, Lord Jesus, Come.

Ode to a Stuffed Mushroom

So I got out my DDR pads for the first time in awhile. There is a wonderful program called Stepmania that allows me to play the equivalent of DDR on the computer. Other than the small screen it really works pretty well.

Hopefully I can get myself to keep playing, since it is actually a good form of cardio and it is fun. About the only exercize I might get myself to do besides walking to school. That's what I got them for in the first place... oh two summers ago. So we can see how well that worked out the first time, but maybe I can do a better job this go around. I'm trying to give up computer games and most of my computer time for Lent, so this is the best justification I can have for playing a game. I think that will help me keep my sanity once school starts again.

Speaking of school, spring break is going swimmingly. I haven't gotten as much homework done yet as I would have liked, but I am getting in some needed relaxation and chores around the house, not to mention spending some much needed time with friends and family.

My loneliness thing has abated somewhat. I know I cannot say that I'm content being alone. I do know that admiting that I'm not doing well has allowed God to work in me. Enough of my stubborn "I'm alright really." I know things will improve from here, even if I'm not going to enjoy all of it.

Anyway, it's off to bed for me.

-Daniel

Aye Aye Aye!

Wow.

It has been awhile since I have written anything here. There is enough that I could write on but I either don't have the time or I get caught up in other things. Hopefully I can get back to it a little. There is certainly plenty going on in my life and I find it very helpful to write things down whether it is online or pen and paper.

Anyway, enough of my apology. I went Salsa dancing tonight. I wasn't really planning on it, but my friends from church decided to go grab some food then head over and dance. I admit, I resisted for a long while. I'm glad I went though. I didn't dance too much, but nonetheless I'm glad I got myself to do it.

I didn't feel like a total clutz. I guess that is a good thing. I wish we had been there earlier and done the lessons they offer beforehand. Next time we go I can do that and maybe I will be at least a little more confident.

I'm also trying to get myself to get myself to use the Dance Dance Revolution mats that I bought. I haven't used them in so long but it was fun and it's good exercise. I think that if I actually got into it, it would be a good way for me to actually do some exercising for once.

So we will see how that goes. It's easier to do DDR with a friend, but the friend that I would be most likely to do it with lives 30 minutes south of me, and I don't have a car so that kinda kills us doing that on any regular occasion. We haven't even played together in a long time.

The only hard thing about tonight is that, to be perfectly honest, I started to miss not being in a relationship. I mean, I have been wrestling with it off and on for awhile now, but never this much. I guess that it has something to do with being close to the girls I went with while dancing. I know I'm a pretty physical person (hugs, cuddling... that kinda stuff) and I could kinda imagine in the back of my mind having a girl next to me to lean up against and watch after dancing for awhile. I know that I'm not ready for a serious relationship right now, but I miss some of the benefits of it.

I guess I have found it to be true that the moment that I know God is working in me in some area, that is the area that gets challenged. I mean, it's really weird. Just in the last few weeks I have come into contact with some new women, mostly through church. I'm not exactly the kind of person to really go out of the way to meet people, so this in itself is kinda weird. And even with a good friend of mine, who I know that a relationship wouldn't work out with, I was feeling a little bit of a longing. Except for my friend, these aren't even people who I know yet, but this little part of my brain wonders if a relationship would ever start between us. I honestly don't know where it all is coming from, and I don't want to look at women like that. I feel like it is really borderline objectification and I don't like that at all.

I mean, before I'm going to consider getting into a relationship I want to know this person pretty well, and spend time with them just getting to know them before I even think about dating. I already learned the hard way about things going quickly. I mean, I met a girl online and talked to her for like two weeks. For whatever reason we seemed to click and I eventually met her in person with one of my friends. Then, out of the blue she tells me the next day that she doesn't want to hear from me again (through a text message nonetheless). I don't exactly feel like I missed out on much, but I know things went waaaaaay to fast and I didn't have the kind of boundaries that I know I need.

I'm not 100% sure at this point whether this is a sign that maybe I am more ready to be in a relationship than I think, or if it is a test for me to become more comfortable where I am at and grow in that. I would heavily lean towards the latter. As much as I would like to be in a relationship right now, I know I have a lot of growing to do. I don't like it, but I know it is necessary. I believe that I can only have a good relationship once I am comfortable being on my own, and that with someone else who is likewise comfortable being on their, because otherwise it would be far to easy to become co-dependant and not have a healthy relationship. That doesn't mean I like it, but I know it needs to be that way.

It's time for bed now. If you got it down here, thanks for taking the time to read my thoughts. I know how nice it is when I just listen to another person and I appriciate you doing that for me.