Is there life after finals?

So grades are due today and I still have two small things to turn in. I really am not doing well with this time management thing. I'm really going to have to figure out how to do this better these next two semesters, especially because they will be my last.

Overall, despite my rampant procrastination, it has been a really good year. I learned a lot and I had some really good times. I'm looking forward to next semester, although it is going to be really, really hard because I'm taking New Testament Greek, along with 2 or 3 upper division English classes, and Ancient Philosophy. I really need to manage my time better or I will die.

I think I have pretty much decided to take a year off once I graduate. It is my understanding that even if I get into a PhD program I can defer it for a year. Of course, that's the other thing. I'm going to be doing some serious praying and try to figure out if I want to continue going down the education route or not.

I have decided that I don't want a "American Christian" life. The church is too comfortable. Now, I'm not going to completely ignore the benefits over the last 1700 years, but I have always had a certain discomfort with the legalization of Christianity by Constantine. I think what is worst, is that it has allowed us Christians to spend too much time debating theological points, and allowing our faith to be dogmatic and ritualized (in all the bad ways) and not actually being out in the world and serving and loving others. Instead of reaching out to the gay community, the broken, the 'sinners' we cast judgment down on them.

How long is it going to take before we realize that if Jesus were here now he wouldn't be in the megachurches preaching sermons to millions of followers or helping take down corrupt governments, or maybe, just maybe, not even working for 'social justice' in the sense of reforming the systems in our world. Instead, he would be out on the streets, praying for and healing the broken and the disenchanted. He would be with those that Christians feel to good to touch, because we somehow forget where we came from.

So I don't know where I am going to end up at this point. I can fully embrace staying in education and being one of the people to equip people to go out into the world in need, while still making an impact in whatever community I'm in. But if God would have me do more somewhere else, I want to try and find out. I want to live a sacrificial life, and that is really hard in the comfort and the pressure of American consumeristic life.

Don't get me wrong, I have no doubt that I will be serving God wherever I end up and whatever I do. And I know who I am right now, and my intellect is one of my strongest gifts. But that doesn't mean that I will live the rest of my life in my office and my classroom if that's what I end up doing, because there are millions of people, billions even, who would not even get close to coming into my classroom, and those people need to be reached out to.

So that's where I'm at with that right now. I'm still in the process of figuring out where I'm going to be volunteering at this summer for the program I'm involved with. I'm going to be living with 5 other people, 4 students and one coordinator. Us students are going to be working 38 hours a week at a non-profit ministry/outreach kinda thing (since it is not a purely Christian program) and then we will be sharing a weekly meal and having different seminars related to different aspects of Social Justice. It is going to be very interesting. I have an interview this Thursday but I don't know if it is the place where I will want to work. I need to pray though, because I want to get beyond what I think is best for myself and where I'm comfortable etc.

In the middle of the program I'm going to be in Israel with a group from my old church (where my parents still go). I'm by far the youngest person and the only other people I really know are my parents and the head pastor, so I have a bit of anticipation for that. But I thought it would be an awesome opportunity so I figured I would take it. I'm kinda sad that I'm going to miss about a week and a half of a 10 week program, but there is not much I can do about it.

I'm meeting with my old youth pastor in a few hours, along with meeting my friend who is here from out of state for a little while among other things so I'm going to wrap up and get ready.

There are many more things which I want to talk about, which I hope I can get to later today. The subjects include, but are not limited to: My experience at my housemate's wedding last weekend and my concurrent thoughts on communion and the unity of the church, current thoughts on romance and my love life (or lack thereof?), the 'end' of my small group and a transition into the 'Nooma' ministry I've been involved in the past 2 Mondays, current interactions with my ex-gf (that is, the one who hasn't refused to talk to me since we broke up) and my best friend from high school, along with many other things which I'm sure will come up. Stay tuned!